Hey, it’s been a while. Not sure how I came back to this but here I am. Crawling up into my polystyrene mattress and typing to the whirling sound of my somber blue fan. Other people have tucked into their sheets. Lights off and covers spread over their loved ones. I’m unsure where would this lead but I see a flickering warm light coming over that here can be a therapeutic place for me and you to open up our locked up self, chained by the fears and the stories we told ourselves.

I hope I can write a book in one month, publish it, and earn some royalties. I’m not even sure what book I would write.

Someone told me that I should write a book that I always search for. 

Looking back since I fell in love with reading, I always wanted to read a book on a historical-drama-detective-supernatural-crossing dimensions book, that has a wispy feels and is filled with Japanese ghouls, Norr magical creatures, Harry Potter beasts, Sirens, Loch Ness Monsters, bishounen (handsome men), my Korean celebrity fantasy, a really evolving, relatable female characters, Asian settings in the dark alleys of Hong Kong and Shang Hai, reflecting the social issues and dilemmas, human struggles. Talking about suicide, dilemmas, and struggles of teens, coming-of-age, Japanese culture that breeds the self-acceptance of suicide prospect. Balance with funny, weird, absurd, and dark yet light humor.

A cross between the princess during Genghis Khan, maybe the Egyptian mystics, a bit of Greece and then Detective Conan level of hidden features, inspirational  – that leave you inspired to take action like the Secret Life of Mitty, P Noodee Vannessa Race’s book on how to improve your brain, the unstretched possibilities that you can be and do anything in the world when you recognize how you let your beliefs, ego, and fears run your life. The get-ready with me Youtube aspect. Cross between non-fiction (real) and the unreal (fiction) genres.

That it’s okay if you don’t have your dream figured out. And if you have figured out and you still lost, then it’s okay. That it’s okay if I leave the country for somewhere else. It’s okay if I want myself and find a way out no matter what.

Now you see how hard is it to find one. The closest I came to such book is Miyuki Miyabe‘s The Sleeping Dragon (1991), All She Was Worth (1997), and Crossfire (2006).

For illustrated manga, the closest is Kaoru Mori’s “Otoyomegatari (Bride’s Stories)”

I want to have the Roald Dahl’s magic – and this article “Roald Dahl Day: 15 reasons Roald Dahl is the best author ever” captured the key elements I want present in my book, especially on the best dress, life lessons, realistic, and a focus on the inner self. I want my book to be like “Wish I had this book when I was 15 so that I wouldn’t hate myself that much, and also when I was 22 so that I would respect myself much more.

Another inspiration is Austin Kleon’s book on “Steal Like An Artist” – my all time favorite because it’s so short and packed with real-life tips to master any situations

I want it to be filled with illustrations and GIFS. Meme reference. Music and etc.

And so, now that I pour my ideas out, I’m getting a clearer and fun sense of what I want.